A New Schnikism: An Open Letter and An Open Heart

Dear You,

Thank you for always being there. Thank you for holding my hand for all this time, even when I was pulling away, retreating, isolating, yelling, screaming, and even blaming you. Thank you for reminding me what true friendship was, and inspiring me to remember how much we’ve been through and that our love is so strong that it can go through this terriple tempest of entanglements without coming untethered. You’ve always been my very best friend, the love of my entire life, and my truest soulmate. Thank you for not letting me down even when I was letting myself down. 

Thank you for saying I Do. I know I let us down and we’ve had to move on. And the past is in the past, and sometimes relationships do not last, however I believe love always will. You are always in my heart and that will never cease. I hope you know that. 

Thank you for always being there. I know I’ve been a total pain in the ass and some days I’m unrelenting, unforgiving, under-appreciating, and I can be the best and worst part of anyone’s day. There’s a bond between us that cannot be broken, no matter how hard we sometimes try. Thank you for picking me up when I’ve crumbled to the floor. 

The mirror can lie. It doesn’t show you what’s inside.

Demi Lovato

No matter how much I do not know, I need you to know that you touched my heart, you touched my soul, and I do not know how I will ever let you go. This bond I feel for you went deeper than anything I’ve ever known. And I don’t know how to say goodbye. I never wanted to say goodbye. I never want to say goodbye. I know there may be some bridges that are aflame and there may be charred ashes all around. I just hope and pray that somehow, someday, sometime, we will meet again. I hoped for a happy ending. I still hope for a happy ending, even when my mind and my too-sharp tongue got the best of me. I need you to see the best of me so we can be the best of us. 

Thank you for teaching me many things over the years. We’ve had our differences and we’ve had our challenges. You taught me how to be a man and how to appreciate the value of hard work. 

Thank you for being a constant source of light. Thank you for being my strength, even when I couldn’t show it. Thank you for pushing me forward when all I wanted to do was stumble and fall. Thank you for yelling at me when I’m stupid and holding me when I’m scared. Thank you for showing me how amazing, how talented, and how awesome I really am. Even when all I wanted to do was break down and cry, thank you for showing me how to dance through the tears and laugh through the rain. 

Hear me now, feel this deep within: I forgive you. 

I forgive you for all the destruction you’ve left in your wake. 

I forgive you for all the friendships you’ve damaged. 

I forgive you for breaking my heart. 

I forgive you for the many things you never seem to forget. 

I forgive you for not being strong. 

I forgive you for the opportunities you seemingly missed out on. 

Hear me again. I forgive you. 

I’ll say it once more: I forgive you. 

I will keep saying it again and again until you believe it: I forgive you. I forgive you. I forgive you. 

Love, 

Me

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s